I know that I have arrived at this party a little later than most but after years of contemplating it…I finally did Botox. Was it everything everyone raves about? Yes and no. Now bear with me and I will explain my answers. It has been years since I have been contemplating doing botox and for good reasons. First, I love natural make-up, skincare, and a clean lifestyle as a whole. I always choose natural ingredients versus synthetics even when I’ve known that they may not work as well.
I am the type of girl that wears little to no makeup and will always be wearing workout clothes (the Miami Corinne was the complete opposite though). Needless to say, kids and my current life has made me more simplistic and less worried about my looks…I mean, I go to the gym and school pickups, why do I need to dress up? But after COVID hit, the years really started showing in my face.
Could the 24 hours EVERY SINGLE DAY for seven months with my children and husband contribute to my rapid aging? OF COURSE, it did! I started to notice my face covered in lines that could not be covered by all the buildable blurr CC cream applications that I continued to pile up onto my face.
So even though I had nowhere to go or any special event to attend, I took the plunge and I did it!
I had no idea what to expect but I went into it with the mind frame that a needle would be poking my face without any pain killer…so needless to say, I was mentally prepared. The whole experience probably took a whole 15 minutes from the time I filled out the forms and walked out of the doctor’s chair. She took a quick glance at me and suggested a shit load of fillers and procedures but I quickly reminded her that I was only interested in the 20 units of botox of which I cheaply paid via Groupon because I had a 20% discount.
Several pokes between my eyebrows and I was left with a slightly red forehead and a fear of the unknown look. You know, the type when your brain takes over your vanity and starts replaying a horror movie of what your face might come out looking like… that was me. What if I can’t move my forehead anymore? What if my eyelid loses mobility and starts looking lazy and tired? What if…that is all I kept thinking about. Yes, most people come out looking fabulous and only a small marginal have a poker face but with my luck, I fall into that category.
Needless to say, the days went by and I could still move my forehead and my expression lines did not go away. WTF?! Did I pay $140 to have my frown lines? When were they going to disappear? How long does this shit take to start working? Well, according to the paperwork…about 2 weeks but if you still have full movement around 14 days, then you need to go back and get some more! Guess what? I was that small marginal of people that BOTOX did nothing for! Absolutely shit! I went back and I said look, I can still move my skin, the lines are still extremely visible…wtf? She showed me my before picture and said, “it looks much, much better. Look how deep your lines use to be”…really? I thought this shit would disappear! But no! I look “much, much better.”
I don’t want to look better! I want to look GOOD.
I argued my points and she had to retouch me with some more botox…she said she would do it as a favor but we both knew that something needed to be done and I wasn’t paying for it! Two more weeks passed by and I can still move and see my frown lines…but ok, maybe, just maybe not as pronounced as they were before. But the little effect it did, it actually made me look slightly better. More refreshed and alive…almost as if I had a full 8 hours of sleep without my children kicking me in the middle of the night.
The killer is knowing that after 3 months, I have to go back and do it all over or my protruding lines will show up again. Pay another $175+ for 20 units and keep doing that for the rest of my life until my face no longer has movement or I am too old to give a shit.
And so you see, that’s the story of botox…the good, the bad, and the ugly.
So would I do it again? Probably, maybe, I really don’t know. Do I want to poke my face and wait two weeks to see if it worked? Then see my lines still stay in my face yet just slightly disappear for a price tag of close to $200? Ask me when I’m 50 and probably had the “Full Work” done. Until then, I will enjoy the remaining 4 weeks of botox effects left until my frown lines creep back in my face like an unwanted guest in your asshole…no pun intended.